Named by them
Only your son or daughter can name a counselor, and whether to name anyone is theirs to decide. Their elders confirm your name and how you are related.
For parents and families
Alongside, if you are asked.
A member may name a father, mother, guardian or another trusted counselor, whom their elders confirm. If you are named, you are told of each mutual interest and introduction. You never read their messages.
Not open yet. One email when it opens, nothing else.
Your part
You pray for your son or daughter to marry well. You also know they are adults, and that pressure rarely helps.
A part to play, if they ask.
Told, not shown
You are told of each mutual interest and copied on each introduction: the other member’s first name, church and profile summary. Never their messages.
Her father’s blessing, if she asks
Many of our churches hold that a man should seek her father’s blessing first. A woman may ask that any man write first to her father or the counselor she names.
What you receive
No account. A few plain emails.
A counselor has no account and no password. You promise to keep confidences. Then you get a plain note at each mutual interest and introduction.
- Promise to keep confidences
- A note at each mutual interest
- A copy of each introduction
- Never their messages
Their choice
The family is part of it. The choice is theirs.
Rebekah’s family gave their blessing (Genesis 24:50–51). Then they asked her, “Will you go with this man?” She said, “I will go” (24:58). A counselor gives counsel. The choice to go on, or not, is your son’s or daughter’s.
See what your son or daughter sees.
A few people at a time, interest kept private, and a plain safety note before the first message and the first meeting.
See the appQuestions
What parents ask first.
Will I be told everything?
No. If you are named, you are told of each mutual interest and copied on each introduction. You never see their messages.
Is it safe?
No one can promise that. Members are affirmed by their elders, which is not a background check, and promise to meet first in public. Anyone can report or block at once. We cannot prevent all harm.
Can I name myself as counselor?
No. Only your son or daughter can name a counselor. If you would like a part, talk with them, gently.
Can a mother, or a friend, be the counselor?
Yes. A father, a mother, a guardian, an older friend or a mentor: anyone they trust, confirmed by their elders.
Not open yet. One email when it opens, nothing else.